Trash Talk by Annie

The text outside says "YOUR PARENTS HAD SEX" while on the inside it's "JUST A LITTLE SOMETHING TO THINK ABOUT ON YOUR BIRTHDAY."

The text outside says "SOMEDAY WE'LL BE TWO DEAR SWEET OLD LADIES!" while on the inside it's "I'M GLAD YOU'RE GOING FIRST! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!"

Made in the USA. Outside: Exercise makes you look better naked. Inside: So does alcohol. Your choice.

Made in the USA. Outside: God made us friends… Inside: because he knew our parents couldn't handle us as sisters.

Made in the USA. Outside: I started having chest pains at the grocery store… Inside: turns out the cart was on my nipples!

Made in the USA. Outside: At your age, swimming can be dangerous. Inside: Lifeguards don't try as hard! Happy Birthday!

A humorous greeting card lending a vintage photograph to coordinate with its outside sentiment and inside sentiment.

A humorous greeting card lending a vintage photograph to coordinate with its outside sentiment and inside sentiment.

Made in the USA. Outside: You don't look a day over fabulous! Inside: Happy Birthday!
Dimensions: 4.75" x 7"
Material: Paper

Outside: If I ever go missing I want my picture on wine bottles instead of milk cartons… Inside: That way my friends will know to look for me.

Outside: Sometimes I think, "Screw this, I'll just become a stripper"… Inside: then I remember, I'm fat and can't dance!

Outside: We'll be friends until we die… Then we will be ghost friends… Inside: and walk through walls and scare the shit out of people!

Outside: You've reached that age where your brain went from "You probably shouldn't say that "… Inside to "What the hell, let's see what happens".

Outside: First, you were a good boy, then a nice kid. You turned into a great guy and grew up to be a fine man. Now, well... Inside: you're just an old fart! Happy Birthday!

Outside: Didn't you think … Inside: growing old would take longer

Made in the USA. Outside: Man is woman's best friend. Inside: He will reassure her when she feels insecure and comfort her after a bad day.

A humorous greeting card lending a vintage photograph to coordinate with its outside "We've Still Got It!" sentiment and inside "But Nobody Wants To See It! Happy Birthday!" sentiment.

Everyone can see it but only you can feel it's true warmth. Thank you... For being the piss in my pants.
Dimensions: 4.75" x 7"
Material: Paper